What really hurt me wasn’t what you did or what you said to me.
It was that you saw me in this pain and you knew how it felt to me because you know me so well. And that you deliberately left me behind in this mess. I never thought someone I loved so much could hurt me so bad. But I’ve been wrong.
I just thought I knew you, I guess. I really did.

All I wish for is to lay six feet under the earth. Yet I am still here. I don’t even know why, there’s just no convicing reason left. I’m not living anymore, just slowly fading away, piece by piece and I feel like I tore people more apart because of that than I would if I was dead. So that’s it. I will take my own life. There’s just nothing left.

Some people believe that we’re connected to our soulmates by invisible threads that bind us for better or worse. And I didn’t mind feeling at home while wrapped up in your arms on long winter nights and I didn’t mind knowing that you’d text me when you got home even if it was 4:30 in the morning just to say you were safe and I didn’t mind that feeling that no matter where in the world I could be there was someone holding on to the hope that I would come back because the world wouldn’t be the same without us being together. I believed in the invisible thread until you clung to a rope of your own for safety. Until you clung to anything else but me. And I unwind the shredded thread that strung itself between you and me and wonder what to do now that my soulmate’s left me. And there’ll always be a mark on my finger where I wound the thought of you and me so tight around myself I thought I’d lost all feeling but nothing hurts more than knowing that I wasn’t your safety. They say soulmates are connected by an invisible string. I say it’s the one that separated us forever.

Everyone leaves, learn how to survive alone.